Kakashi's Revenge
by yuyuhakushofan
Summary: He could tolerate the yelling, the pointed fingers and the insulting of his hair. But stealing MakeOut Paradise? No. That was going too far.
1. MakeOut Paradise Stolen

Nyaha! It's me again. And now I'm writing a Naruto fic! Yay! My first Naruto fic! OK so yea enjoy!

Disclaimer: Don't own Naruto.

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Hatake Kakashi stepped out of the shower, a towel slung around his waist.

His gray hair was wet enough with water that gravity caused it to cover his acquired _Sharingan_ eye. Kakashi smiled. Showers always calmed him down after training his annoying _genin_ from Cell 7.

'And now, to complete my day, Make-Out Paradise!' Kakashi thought as he headed towards his bedroom. Changing into nightclothes and snuggling under his wind-mill _shuriken_ patterned sheets, Kakashi turned around to grab a volume of Make-Out Paradise.

A troubled look graced Kakashi's features. Something was amiss. Normally, Make-Out Paradise was next to his pictures. The twenty-six year old _jônin _ scratched his head.

'Maybe I misplaced it?' Kakashi contemplated. 'Well, I do have a tendency to re-read it.' Thinking, Kakashi rose out of bed and began to walk around his room.

"What if its under the bed?" he said aloud, diving under his bed. A few minutes later, Kakashi emerged, empty-handed and covered in dust. "So much for that shower," he muttered, getting up and wiping the dust off his face.

As a last resort, Kakashi turned to the plant next to his alarm clock. "Ukki-kun," he began, humiliated that he was talking to a half-dead plant. "Ukki-kun, do you know where my Make-Out Paradise is?" Silence. Kakashi shrugged. It's not like he expected an answer. **Everyone** knows that plants can't talk.

It was then that Kakashi noticed something. He looked closer, and saw a crack in Ukki-kun's pot. 'What?' Then, a smudge on Kakahi's photos caught his eye. Gingerly picking up the pictures, he noticed fingerprints. Small, feminine fingerprints. But that wasn't all that was at the scene of the crime. At the space that was once occupied by Make-Out Paradise, were tufts of hair. Blonde hair.

A cracked pot. Fingerprints on his prized pictures. Blonde hair where Make-Out Paradise should be. All the evidence pointed to one thing- Uchiha Sasuke, Haruno Sakura and Uzumaki Naruto had broken into their _sensei's_ house and stolen Make-Out Paradise.

He knew that his students thought him to be weird. He could tolerate the yelling, the pointed fingers and the insulting of his hair. But stealing Make-Out Paradise? No. That was going too far.

Kakashi, distraught at first, began to laugh. An evil, sickening laugh. Hadn't the _genin_ witnessed his power? Weren't they afraid of the consequences? "No matter," said Kakashi, crawling into bed. "The members of Cell 7 will soon learn not to mess with Hatake Kakashi." With an evil laugh, he fell asleep, dreaming his revenge.

(--------)

Oooo. A tad scary ending.

I got the idea when my brother stole my RK manga. I ended up hurting myself tho'.

This story takes place between the time they finished off Zabuza and the beginning of the Chûnin exams.

Anywhose, should I continue?

Review please!


	2. Reason for the Plan

Hey it's me again! Sorry it took so long, I finally have free time between school and v-ball. Soooo, on with chapter 2!

Disclaimer: Don't own Naruto. If I did, I'd probably ruin it. LoL

(----)

Naruto, Sakura and Sasuke were all at Naruto's house. Sasuke was sitting in silence as usual, while Sakura was trying to get him to talk. Naruto was giggling over Make-Out Paradise. "E heh heh heh," he laughed, flipping the pages.

What was he laughing at? We can only take a guess as to the contents of Make-Out Paradise. My guess? Many instances of kissing couples, a big-breasted woman, perverted good-looking guys, bikinis and a few naked scenes. But back to the story.

"Hey Sasuke! Maybe you should read this. I bet it'll be your first time getting aroused. Heh heh," Naruto jested. Sasuke just gave Naruto a death glare and said, "Dunce."

Sakura noticed the tension between her teammates and decided to change the subject. "It was a close call back at Kakashi-_sensei's_ house, ne?" The two boys looked at Sakura and nodded.

"If he wasn't home, we would've had more time to look around, Naruto said, not looking up from Kakashi's book. Sakura nodded. "Yeah. Those pictures were really nice." She sighed. "His team photo looked like ours."

Sasuke shifted his glance back to Naruto and Make-Out Paradise. "So, why did we steal that book again?" Naruto looked up in annoyance. "Because Sasuke, Kakashi-_sensei_ was really annoying and mean today." He gave Sasuke a 'duh' look, as if his explanation was valid.

Sasuke snorted. "How is that different from any other day, dunce?" He grinned maliciously.

Pop. Pop. Pop. "Arrgh!" Naruto screamed, jumping up from his chair and pouncing on Sasuke. "Why do you always call me that! I'm not stupid!" He began to punch Sasuke's chest. But Sasuke just blocked.

Sakura slapped her forehead. 'My god, how stupid can they be?' "Oi, Naruto, get off of him." She lunged forward and dragged Naruto off Sasuke. Throwing him onto the chair, she turned to Sasuke and began to scold him.

"Stop picking on him! And if you're oh-so-curious about Naruto's plan, think back to his morning!"

"Hmmm…"

(-Flashback: Earlier that day-)

Sakura looked horrible and she felt disgusting. There were dark circles under her eyes, her hair was frizzy and she was starving. She had skipped breakfast to make the meeting on time.

Sasuke was sitting on the steps. He had been there for a good fifteen minutes, arriving early. Having nothing better to do, he just sat there. Naruto on the other hand, was trying to catch his breath. He woke up late and ran all the way to the meeting spot, shoving his breakfast into his mouth.

The only problem was that he was in his pajamas. Orange pajamas with little _shuriken_ scattered about. And, he had forgotten his headband.

"So where is Kakashi-_sensei_?" Naruto gasped. Sakura gave him an are-you-stupid? Look. "He's late Naruto. L-A-T-E." 'I'm so gonna pound Kakashi-_sensei­ _when he gets here.' Inner Sakura cracked her knuckles.

About three hours passed. The young _genin_ were bored, hungry and furious. Kakashi hadn't shown up! While the _genin_ were lazing about, a shadowy figured appeared before them.

"Good morning! I took a trip down memory lane and boy, was it long!" Kakashi said, waving to his team, his classic smile on his face. Sakura and Naruto both jumped up, their eyes ablaze.

"You are so full of it Kakashi-_sensei_!" they yelled and pointed in unison. Kakashi giggled (if a twenty-six year old ninja can giggle) and smiled at the three. He wondered what their reaction would be if he told them that the real reason he was late was because he couldn't get rid of the Jehovah's Witness outside his door.

"Well," he said, clapping his hands together. "Let's head out shall we? Sasuke, Sakura, follow me." He was about to take off when Naruto tackled him. "What about me, huh? I'm part of Cell Seven too, y'know!" Naruto sat there, pouting with his arms crossed.

Pushing Naruto off and getting to his feet, Kakashi said, "Real ninja don't wear pajamas or forget their headband." There was so much authority in his voice that it scared Naruto. And he was left dumbstruck as the three ninja took off.

(-Present Time-)

"So you see, that's why we stole Make-Out Paradise from Kakashi-_sensei­. _He was mean to me! Plus, you guys agreed." Naruto sat there triumphantly, now that Sasuke had remembered and he filled in the blanks.

"I don't see the point. It's not like he did anything to us." Sasuke stood up and walked to the kitchen, bored of the conversation. Naruto smiled and looked over at Sakura. Her head was down and she was fiddling with her hair.

"Is something the matter Sakura?" the blonde asked a hint of concern in his voice. Sakura looked at Naruto. "Well, actually…" She trailed off and sighed. "Actually, I agreed because Kakashi-_sensei_ did something to me."

"_Nani?"_ Naruto's eyes grew wide. Kakashi had hurt his girlfriend! Well, she wasn't really, but Naruto had watched enough soap operas to formulate plans to make her his. Sakura laughed at the size of the blonde's cerulean eyes. "Yea, pervert-_sensei_ copped a feel during practice."

Naruto sputtered. "Y'hear that Sasuke! Sakura was molested! So we have to carry out our plan!" Naruto was bouncing off the walls; he was so full of energy and rage.

Sasuke had heard everything. Why do you think he was in the kitchen? Sighing, and taking a bite of his sandwich, he said, "Ok, fine. We'll finish the plan."

(-------)

So, whaddya think? I hope it wasn't fast paced.

Suspenseful ne? LoL

Well hopefully you liked it. And I've decided to continue so that I've actually finished a story on time without major delays. –coughPunkDcough-

Please review!

Ja ne!


	3. And So it Starts

Hey hey! It's been a year and longer. I am so sorry to those who have waited. But I'm finally a senior, so I'll have more time on my hands. On with the story!

Disclaimer: Don't own Naruto. –sigh-

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Bright sunlight flooded the world as the sun peeked over the horizon. Birds were chirping cheerily at all windows. Happiness could be found everywhere. Everywhere, except Kakashi's house. A dark storm cloud loomed over it with lightning flashing every five seconds.

Inside the house, Kakashi was stomping about. The sexy _jônin _was trying to formulate a plan of revenge. Should he give Cell 7 an impossibly hard practice? Nah, they were too advanced tanks to his superb training.

"Maybe, Ukki-_kun_, I won't allow them to take the Chûnin exams!" Kakashi snapped his fingers in glee. Since the theft of his beloved Make-Out Paradise, Kakashi would talk to Ukki-_kun_ to save his sanity.

Taking an Igor-like stance, Kakashi began to pet Ukki-_kun_ where it had been cracked. A Sesame Street band-aid covered the spot. As he stroked his plant, Kakashi murmured to himself, building upon fragmented ideas.

Ten minutes later, Kakashi shouted "SCORE" and pumped his fists into the air. He proceeded to dance about his room, imitating the likes of Michael Jackson and MC Hammer. It's a downright shame that Kakashi doesn't own a pair of Hammer pants.

With a newfound happiness, Kakashi headed into the kitchen to eat some breakfast. Two bowls of Coco Puffs later, he headed towards the Hokage's office for some chit-chat. Cell 7 could wait.

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Chirp. Chirp. Chirp. Sakura, hungry, sleep-deprived and easily irritated, glared at the happy-go-lucky blue-jays overhead.

'Shut up already!' Inner Sakura tore at her hair.

Chirp. Chirp. Chirp. The mentioned birds began to dance in circles around each other and peck in the air.

"Awe how cute! A mating ritual…NOT!" Sakura flung a stone at the bird couple. She missed her mark, and the birds flew away, chirping excitedly.

"Kuso," the pink-haired _kunoichi_ muttered to herself. She folded her knees and rested her head on her lap.

"Just because its spring doesn't and the whole rest of the world is in love doesn't mean it has to be rubbed in the faces of single people!" Sakura wailed to no one in particular. It wasn't fair. She read the latest fashion magazines: Kunoichi, Genin-Ch_û_nin, even NinjaBody! Sakura also read the raunchier, racier magazines like SexyJutsu or Tsunade, just in case she came across an older, more experienced ninja.

Sakura sighed. 'I wish I had a sexy boyfriend like Sasuke-_kun_ or Kakashi-_sensei_.'

Miles away, said sexy ninjas sneezed.

While Sakura was wallowing in pity, a figure approached her. He stood in her way until she noticed him in all his orange jumpsuit glory. Sakura lazily stared up at her teammate. "Hey Naruto," she sighed.

"Oi, Sakura! Cheer up! The day has just begun!" Naruto exclaimed, spreading his arms to indicate the fresh open air. His grin changed to a frown when he noticed how depressed Sakura was.

"Oi." Naruto crouched down to eye level and mussed up the _kunoichi's_ hair. "Whatsa matter Sakura? Y'know you can tell me, right?" His pleading cerulean eyes bore into her emerald ones.

"I don't know Naruto. I just feel so…so…" Sakura searched for the words but couldn't find them. She threw her hands up in frustration. "Aaaahhh! I feel stupid and ugly and unloved, OK!" Exasperated, Sakura lay down on the concrete. 'This sucks,' she thought. 'Spilling my feelings to Naruto? Ugh, how lame!' Inner Sakura pounded her head against a wall.

Naruto stood above his teammate, hand scratching his chin. "Hmmm," he pondered aloud. 'What can I do to make Sakura feel better? … Oh, I know!' Naruto dropped a fist into his open palm.

"Oh Sakuraaaa," the blonde singsonged. She looked up at her blonde teammate, noting the super gleeful grin spreading across his face. "What _baka_?" Naruto grabbed Sakura's hand and pulled her up. "We're going shopping!" he exclaimed, pumping a fist into the air.

"_Nani?!"_

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Minutes after the pair left, both Sasuke and Kakashi arrived at the meeting spot. They found a note on the floor saying:

'Out shopping. Sorry to skip practice, but it's important!'

Peace, Naruto & Sakura

Kakashi and Sasuke stared at the note in the chûnin's hands. "Well, that's just awkward." Kakashi shuffled his feet. "Yep." Sasuke nodded.

And they walked away.

(--------)

Whoo! So I finished Chapter 3! I feel so proud of myself, updating (even though it's been forever.)

Hopefully, people still read this story.

Please review friends!

Ja Ne


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